1. You build supportive relationships
Traditionally, we build friendships based on proximity. Social psychology shows us that we tend to have a greater fondness for those whom we spend more time with. We often build these friendships at a young age but as we change and our lives change, these relationships fail to change with us. As a result, we can end up spending a great deal of time with people who no longer support our growth as human beings.
When you are living purposefully, you understand the need to evaluate relationships to ensure that they are mutually supportive . It is not just about what others can do for you, it is also important that you be able to help others. The objective is not to kick old friends out of your life (unless it is absolutely necessary); the objective is to organise your priorities.
2. You take responsibility
When you are living purposefully, you do not run away from your problems. You do not blame others for what has gone wrong in your life. You accept full responsibility for the results which you achieve. When you don’t get the results you desire, you identify the changes that you can make and put a plan in place to make those changes.
3. You are authentic
You know who you are – your purpose, your values , your principles and your goals . You dedicate your life to pursuing these. When conflict arises or difficult decisions need to be made, you do not bow to the pressures of others. You consult your own conscience and you take what you believe to be the best course of action. One of the mottos by which I live my life is:
‘Do what you believe to be right and accept the consequences’.
4. You put your own needs first
If you want to be in the best position to help others; you must first ensure that you are the best
‘You’ that you can be. Living in a constant state of sacrifice, where you always put the needs of others first, is both unhealthy and unviable.
If you focus on continuously growing as a person, you will constantly be developing new knowledge and skills which you can use to serve others, while also achieving your own goals and objectives.
5. You are more decisive
It is easy to waste time over analysing things but you no longer do that. You are crystal clear on what you want and what you are trying to achieve which makes decision-making a much easier process. Something either serves your purpose or it does not.
6. You don’t wait for perfection
Perfectionism kills confidence, productivity and performance. If you wait for the perfect moment before doing something; you will never do it. There is no such thing as perfection. Things can always be improved. Rather than wait for perfection, you know that it is best to get to work, do the best you can and if necessary, make adjustments later.
7. You don’t compete
You pursue supportive, collaborative relationships which are aimed at achieving mutual benefits. You do not feel the need to compete with others. Success in life is not about doing better than other people, it is about being the best that you can be. When you understand this, you realise that each person is unique and there is sufficient opportunity for us all too live happy, healthy and successful lives. Therefore there is no need for competition, comparison or jealousy.
8. You set the standards for yourself
You set the standard at which you wish to live and work. Others may choose to adopt different standards; that is their prerogative. As an authentic person, living purposefully, you will not allow anybody to lower your standards.
9. You live by your values
Values are one of your conscience’s ways of communicating with you. They set guidelines for how you might like to behave. When you act in accordance with your values , you will be much happier for it. When you act in conflict with your values, you will experience inner turmoil.
10. You don’t feel the need to explain yourself
You understand that each person is unique and they must live their own purpose. You do not require others to explain their choices and you feel no need to explain yourself to those who do not understand you.
11. You appreciate
When you live purposefully, you see the beauty in life. Not just the big moments; you see the beauty in the small moments too. You take the time to appreciate each of these moments. This is the true wealth in life.
12.You banish worry and guilt
In his book ‘Your Erroneous Zones: Step-by-Step Advice for Escaping the Trap of Negative Thinking and Taking Control of Your Life’ , Dr. Wayne W. Dyer correctly describes worry and guilt as useless emotions. Guilt is living in the past. It is wasting time thinking about things which you cannot change. Worry is equally useless. It requires you to spend time getting upset about things which might never happen.
Rather than be bogged down by either of these emotions, you know that it is better to focus on the best course of action that you can take. You trust that you can handle anything that comes your way and because you have built supportive relationships, you know will be able to find people to help you, should you need it.
Do you feel your living with purpose?What do you think.